Conservative Home run polls quite frequently to see who the members think the next leader should be. For the past eighteen months or so this has been a bit like being on The Titanic and picking straws to see who should replace the captain after the iceberg has been struck. But I suppose it passes the time. Usually, the winner is "none of the above" as if the members think there is a complete unknown amongst the 2017 intake who could take over the leadership and weld up the massive Brexit hole below the waterline. Hope is always the last thing to die.
Anyway, the last poll (HERE) has none other than Boris Alexander de Pfeffel Johnson, he of the unsound mind and globule of bright blond hair styled by Vileda. And guess who the members put in second place? Yes, it was Jacob Rees-Mogg!! The right honourable member for the eighteenth century who always looks like he's wearing a 1950 ex army demob suit given to him just before he caught a really bad case of consumption. Sinister doesn't begin to cut it. The dream ticket of the Conservative associations, BoJo as PM and JRM as chancellor, is the nightmare ticket for the rest of us. A sort of slasher movie for self harming political anoraks.
We would be declaring war on the EU within 48 hours. Barnier would despair.
One wonders if the dwindling number of party members have all taken leave of their senses. What message is that intended to send to the EU? It's like asking them to continue the withdrawal negotiations with a joke cracking Oliver Hardy figure, stiffened up by Heinrich Himmler. It's insane. It's don't know and won't know acting in a concert of ignorance.
No deal would be assured regardless of the cost to the nation and individuals or how long it might take.
The government would be sending out the Unwins seed catalogue to help us in a dig for victory drive as the government vaunted food stockpile turns out to be no more than a few tins of peas at a warehouse in Accrington. Housewives would be urged to send in their unwanted saucepans to turn into one or two lonely F35s to go with each of our aircraft carriers. The rest could be mock-ups produced at the Morgan factory out of balsa wood.
The planet is in a bit of a state at the moment what with global warming, Trump, Russia, the middle east, Zimbabwe and the rest of it. We are all in need of a good joke - let BoJo and JRM loose and the world would die laughing at us.
